tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-65907382024-02-18T21:00:24.724-06:00Gaudi's CrossThoughts on life and spirituality by Annette GulickTimGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06309973042383478524noreply@blogger.comBlogger34125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-88363518923745851502011-10-12T12:27:00.004-05:002011-10-12T12:29:39.777-05:00Our Community of Pilgrims<div style="margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center;">
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For most pilgrims, the <i>Camino</i> is a personal journey.
We walked it with a group of twenty seven and had a support staff of four who
met up with us in the evenings to bring us our meals.</div>
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The training event was for new staff working in Europe, so
we had a potpourri of nations represented - Slovenia, England, Spain, Portugal,
France, Holland, Germany, Czech Republic, Colombia and Brazil- as well as a
number of Americans, some who came over from the US and others who work
internationally. Our ages ranged from fourteen to fifty two and our experience
with walking varied as much as our ages. Some walk parts of the Camino every
year. Others had walked for several days during other training events. But most
of us were new to the experience. </div>
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We were kind of like a church in that we didn’t choose each
other as companions but we ended up becoming a community because we shared a
common goal. As pilgrims our goal was reaching Santiago de Compostela, but this
was only a learning environment we hoped would help us get closer to our
overarching goal: living out the <a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Mark%2012:28-34&version=MSG">Great Commandment</a> and the<a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=mt%2028:16-20&version=MSG"> Great Commission</a>. </div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi73kEeSh7bOw-fYGN6kVxz-qEtiJaEXPqzkZY5aq8OgfSVg3GlXywtbEAtbECw6pUbOz65zh23rPomLsHPBff4vL5Wece2qtyeGaAcc-GR8a3mdKuQ3yuJ3-49D_fYWLgevC_ETw/s1600/IMG_2147.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="232" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi73kEeSh7bOw-fYGN6kVxz-qEtiJaEXPqzkZY5aq8OgfSVg3GlXywtbEAtbECw6pUbOz65zh23rPomLsHPBff4vL5Wece2qtyeGaAcc-GR8a3mdKuQ3yuJ3-49D_fYWLgevC_ETw/s320/IMG_2147.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> Marc & Eva, pilgrims extraordinaire</td></tr>
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Even though we were a collection of independent adults, our
community was not a free-for-all. A couple from <st1:city><st1:place>Barcelona</st1:place></st1:city>
headed up the whole event and they were the prototype of contemporary
leadership. I’ll write more about what I learned from them later...suffice
it to say here that not only did they make sure that the logistics ran smoothly but they were model pilgrims. </div>
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When you’re new to something, and a little
intimidated by what lies ahead, its very reassuring to be surrounded by a
community of fellow travelers which includes people who give you the confidence
that not only will you make it but you’ll be glad you did.</div>
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</div>annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-20277124787973871752011-10-09T22:56:00.000-05:002011-10-09T22:56:04.900-05:0080 miles in 5 days<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBACSVS-BWWqNuRFAAJDR2gQxczzSvruR9LUcvbUMW-AM2AsVD1CSztZSqQ040UWhSwWq33CWfHqSte2hyphenhyphenntb8U1LG2VSYRFk5KkAsoVRvmd_lS3aEk7wNxr-zk5fLNXwaxgOhFw/s1600/IMG_1629.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBACSVS-BWWqNuRFAAJDR2gQxczzSvruR9LUcvbUMW-AM2AsVD1CSztZSqQ040UWhSwWq33CWfHqSte2hyphenhyphenntb8U1LG2VSYRFk5KkAsoVRvmd_lS3aEk7wNxr-zk5fLNXwaxgOhFw/s640/IMG_1629.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">That’s how far we walked along the <i>Camino de Santiago</i> in northern <st1:country-region><st1:place>Spain </st1:place></st1:country-region></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">last August</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">. Friends of ours have been so enthusiastic about their experiences walking the <i>Camino</i>
that we jumped at the opportunity to help out at a training event which uses it as its matrix. Part of the training involved working as <i>hospitaleros</i>
(hosts) at a hostel called “the Pilgrim’s Fountain” and part of it involved actually being <i>peregrinos</i> (pilgrims).</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">During our ten years in <st1:country-region><st1:place>Mexico</st1:place></st1:country-region>
we saw a lot of people on pilgrimage to various religious shrines and never
felt an inclination to participate. Somehow the <i>Camino</i> is different than
other pilgrimage routes. A Portuguese man walking with his wife explained it
this way, “The pilgrimages to <st1:place>Fatima</st1:place> or even the
Portuguese route to <st1:city><st1:place>Santiago</st1:place></st1:city> are
about suffering or asking for something. But the <i>Camino to Santiago</i> is
about gratitude."</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We’re grateful for the experience and don’t want to forget
what we saw and learned so I’ll be posting excerpts from my diary with pictures
from the walk. It’ll be almost like reliving the Camino, without the tired
legs.</span></div>
annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-18542317090943938762011-07-08T07:59:00.002-05:002011-10-09T23:11:09.267-05:00Beyond Duality (again)<div class="MsoNormal">
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<i><span style="font-size: 11pt;"><b>Holy wisdom is not clear and thin like water, but thick and dark like blood.</b>*<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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c.s. lewis. till we have faces.</div>
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Jesus’ declaration to be “living water,” the makeup and mechanism of our bodies, even the composition of blood itself, underscore to the importance of water. However scripture also assigns great value to blood: to the thick and dark, the mysterious and opaque, the paradoxical (the very thing that stains the ground for generations can wash clean a soul; the unseen seat of life which when in view is a portent of death). </div>
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The place of both water and blood in our relationship with God are affirmed in the sacraments of baptism and communion while their seemingly opposing natures are united in a masterful transposition that elevates Christianity beyond both philosophy and religion. Jesus first miracle was to change water into wine and once His blood had been poured out, blood loses its place in the cultic practice and is replaced by wine: “Take this, all of you, and drink from it…” <o:p></o:p></div>
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In Christ, the opaque becomes translucent and the transparent becomes colorful. In Christ, the opposite of death isn’t life, but abundant life. Death isn’t only defeated. It is swallowed up by victory. </div>
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For centuries the Christian church highlighted the “thick and dark” parts of the faith. As humanity changed its preferences, the Church shifted its emphasis to that which is transparent, simple, and easy to digest. Without diminishing either, may we now recover wine as a rich symbol for the Christian life?</div>
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Water and blood come from above but wine is something we make. This making is a process, a messy process with startling results, and one that involves a sort of death to self in order for the individual grape to be reborn as part of something greater than itself, something that brings out the fullest possibilities of its essential qualities.</div>
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Duality: Water and blood. Heaven and Earth. God and <st1:state><st1:place>Man.</st1:place></st1:state></div>
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Beyond Duality: Water and blood and wine – <i>the sacred mystery which up till now has been hidden in every age and every generation, but which is now as clear as daylight to those who love God. They are those to whom God has planned to give a vision of the full wonder and splendor of his secret plan for the nations. And the secret is simply this: Christ in you! Yes, Christ in you bringing with him the hope of all the glorious things to come.</i> ( Colossians 1:27, Phillips)</div>
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*These words of Orual, the protagonist of C.S. Lewis’ preferred book of his writing, <i>Till We Have Faces</i>, contrast her perception of the Greek philosophy (water) taught to her by her beloved tutor and the pagan religion (blood) which offered sacrifices to the goddess Ungit. </div>
annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-30001212854498704682011-05-29T15:56:00.002-05:002011-05-31T07:54:12.433-05:00DaffodilsYou have to plant them when it's cold and dreary and you don't feel like being outside for them to be bright beacons of spring when you least expect it.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhnl29Dpt_Na7_mVOqi1oxiZcC7U6TyIo_UiBLjceQA0QAT6xqNNQvW_MC-BQkwf62Z7jC79r88Wq1YqIUpf4CqI3k-JyoPn4T1hbrsEve9bDLz3RwI8lCTyf61wr_u2VqmQQHRA/s1600/DAffodils.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhnl29Dpt_Na7_mVOqi1oxiZcC7U6TyIo_UiBLjceQA0QAT6xqNNQvW_MC-BQkwf62Z7jC79r88Wq1YqIUpf4CqI3k-JyoPn4T1hbrsEve9bDLz3RwI8lCTyf61wr_u2VqmQQHRA/s320/DAffodils.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-77572680821704374042011-01-02T21:34:00.000-06:002011-01-02T21:34:36.702-06:00סֶֽלָה (Stop and listen)<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:ApplyBreakingRules/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> <w:UseFELayout/> </w:Compatibility> <w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if !mso]><img src="http://img2.blogblog.com/img/video_object.png" style="background-color: #b2b2b2; " class="BLOGGER-object-element tr_noresize tr_placeholder" id="ieooui" data-original-id="ieooui" /> <style>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in;"><i>Open my eyes that I may see <br />
wonderful things in your law</i>. Ps. 119:18</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Over the past two weeks that I’ve been working on this project I alternate between trying to master the technical building blocks of Hebrew and meditating on specific verses from Psalm 119. <span> </span>I paused at verse 18 which literally says, </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Open</div><div class="MsoNormal">my eyes</div><div class="MsoNormal">may behold</div><div class="MsoNormal">Wonderful</div><div class="MsoNormal">your law</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">This verse resonates with me because it reflects my desire to have the eyes to see wonderful things. However it also shows up the gap between my thinking and the orientation of the psalmist in that when I think of glorious things to behold I don’t think first and foremost of God’ law. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">As I pause here, I remember that the opening of the eyes (literally “uncovering” or “removing” which reminds me of the book of Acts when it recounts how “something like scales fell from Saul’s eyes” 9:18) is not something I achieve but is a work of the Holy Spirit. And so this verse becomes a prayer with a double petition: first that my eyes might be opened and second that I will come to appreciate God’s revelation as the most wonderful of objects to be pondered.</div>annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-87443263220565486972011-01-01T14:12:00.002-06:002011-01-01T14:20:07.961-06:00A Hebrew Primer - Gimel<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:worddocument> <w:view>Normal</w:View> <w:zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:compatibility> <w:breakwrappedtables/> <w:snaptogridincell/> <w:applybreakingrules/> <w:wraptextwithpunct/> <w:useasianbreakrules/> <w:usefelayout/> </w:Compatibility> <w:browserlevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if !mso]><object classid="clsid:38481807-CA0E-42D2-BF39-B33AF135CC4D" id="ieooui"></object> <style> st1\:*{behavior:url(#ieooui) } </style> <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:10.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";} </style> <![endif]--> <p class="MsoNormal"><b>Gimel is for <i>Gamol</i></b> (to deal fully or adequately with, deal out to, wean, ripen)</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in;"> <i>Be good to your servant while I live,<br /> that I may obey your word.</i> Ps 119: 17</p> <p class="MsoNormal">This verse brings us back to the theme of blessing, but this time in the form of a petition. According to the NAS exhaustive concordance <i>gamol</i> has a broad variety of meanings. And there is a bit of a leap from these definitions to how it is translated in verse 17, to be good to, but there an experiential reality that unites them: something that has reached a state of fullness. (The functional equivalent that comes to mind is “He’s in a good place.”) When I see a full, luscious looking peach, I know that it grew under the right conditions to reach that state. It had sufficient water and sunlight and nutrients and the right temperatures at the right times in its maturing process to reach its rosy, juicy maturity. </p> <p class="MsoNormal">A weaned child illustrates a different kind of fullness but a similar sense of the fact that they are in a good place, a satisfied state, because their needs have consistently been met. We see this sense of security and peace when David uses <i>gamol</i> to describe himself in Psalm 131:2,</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in;"> <i>But I have calmed and quieted myself,<br /> I am like a weaned child with its mother;<br /> like a weaned child I am content.</i></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Asking God to “be good” to me doesn’t resonate with me, especially in the light of the rest of the verse. It feels ungrateful or whiny. But I can understand the psalmist when I think about how I want my starting place to be trust in the fact that God will meet my needs. I don’t need to clamor like a hungry baby. God know what I need and he promises to meet those needs with good things. But I still look to him and say, “I’m trying to put other’s needs and concerns before my own, but there are things that I need and am worried about and I’m counting on you to come through there however you see fit.”</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><b>Interaction vs Cause & Effect</b><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal">Translations of this verse vary widely depending on how the translator sees the grammatical relationship of three verbs: <i>gamol</i> (to deal fully with); <i>chayah</i> (to live); <i>shamar</i> (to keep). Some translations have the psalmist asking God to be good to him so he can live and obey (NASB, NLT) while others like the NIV infer that obeying is a result of living. This ambiguity frustrated me, but this frustration showed me that I was looking for a sort of propositional logic in the verse; I was expecting the grammar to show me the author’s view of the logical relationship between these three elements. Recently Tim and I have been talking about non-verbal ways to perceive reality, like color or music, elements whose interaction has an effect that is not primarily logical. So instead of trying to figure out which translation was correct, I spent time thinking about the interplay between life and keeping the law of God along the lines of Young’s literal translation: <i>Confer benefits on Thy servant, I live, and I keep Thy word</i>. Here is an example of those thoughts. </p> <p class="MsoNormal"><b>More Life, More Word Keeping - </b>It’s not uncommon to hear about someone who has tried to bargain with God, promising to do something for Him in exchange for his letting them live a little longer but I don’t think that sort of bargaining is what the psalmist has in mind. His love for God’s ways is so intense that I imagine that if he is asking for longer life his petition is like that of a kid begging to stay at the playground longer or the person who wants to sit at the table longer to enjoy one more bite of their favorite food.<br /></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><br /></p>annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-34245009252969108572010-12-29T10:51:00.003-06:002010-12-29T12:06:16.443-06:00A Hebrew Primer - Bet<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:worddocument> <w:view>Normal</w:View> <w:zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:compatibility> <w:breakwrappedtables/> <w:snaptogridincell/> <w:applybreakingrules/> <w:wraptextwithpunct/> <w:useasianbreakrules/> <w:usefelayout/> </w:Compatibility> <w:browserlevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if !mso]><object classid="clsid:38481807-CA0E-42D2-BF39-B33AF135CC4D" id="ieooui"></object> <style> st1\:*{behavior:url(#ieooui) } </style> <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:10.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman";} </style> <![endif]--> <p class="MsoNormal"><b>Learning curve</b><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal">My original plan for digging into Hebrew was straightforward: since the first word of each verse of Psalm 119 starts with a letter of the alef-bet, I would use the first word of each section as my key word for each letter.<span style=""> <span style="font-style: italic;"> </span></span><span style="font-style: italic;">Alef </span>is for “How happy!” <span style="font-style: italic;">Bet </span>is for … "the interrogative and indefinite particle What? How? or anything and is spelled mah." What??<span style=""> </span>I don’t remember what particles are and I’m frustrated that there’s not a <span style="font-style: italic;">bet</span> in sight. This hiccup in my plan serves to remind me that my Hebrew project is actually going to take work. It isn't possible to learn a language and to enter into a different worldview quickly and in just a few minutes a day.<span style=""><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style=""><br /></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><b>Bet is for Baruk (To kneel, to bless)</b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in;"><i>Praise be to you, LORD;<br /> teach me your decrees.</i><span style=""> </span><span style="font-size:78%;">Ps 119:12</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Both <i>esher</i> and <i>baruk</i> are translated "blessed" but they don’t seem to be synonyms. <i>Esher</i> exclaims "How happy is someone when…" while <i>baruk</i> is the linguistic expression of an action, “to kneel before someone and by implication to bless God as an act of adoration” (Strong’s Exhaustive Concordance). <span style=""> </span>Even though I haven’t ever kneeled before anyone, I have enough biblical and historical references to understand the idea. Philippians 2:9-11 is a prime example of it, and one that actually includes me: </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in;"><i>Therefore God exalted him to the highest place<br /> and gave him the name that is above every name,<br />that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,<br /> in heaven and on earth and under the earth,<br />and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord,<br /> to the glory of God the Father.</i></p> <p class="MsoNormal">This scenario shows how the action of kneeling before someone and the praiseworthy character of the one being kneeled before are two sides of the same coin. There is a balance, in the sense of fitting correspondence, between the two elements. </p> <p class="MsoNormal">I have heard that the Hebrew worldview is more holistic than the Greek one so I’m going to let <i>baruk</i> remind me that praise is not an activity that primarily involves my mouth or even my brain but that it is the response of my whole being to the worthiness of God. </p>annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-82821714752660336752010-12-24T22:18:00.004-06:002010-12-24T22:46:46.297-06:00A Hebrew Primer - Aleph<em></em>Twenty years after quitting Hebrew class in graduate school, I have decided to learn Hebrew.<br /><br />Here are a few of the reasons:<br /><ul><li><em>Originality consists of returning to the original</em> - Antoni Gaudi </li><li>I have come to see how language both forms and reflects people’s worldview, so I want to dig into the language used by the people with whom the God who is communicated with in a written form.</li><li>I hope to add depth to my understanding of important realities by seeing them through the prism of the original words.</li></ul> <p class="MsoNormal"> Because Psalm 119 is a poem using the letters of the “alef-bet” I plan on using it as my primer…. a sort of Hebraic “A is for Apple.”<br /></p><p class="MsoNormal"><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:worddocument> <w:view>Normal</w:View> <w:zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:compatibility> <w:breakwrappedtables/> <w:snaptogridincell/> <w:applybreakingrules/> <w:wraptextwithpunct/> <w:useasianbreakrules/> <w:usefelayout/> </w:Compatibility> <w:browserlevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if !mso]><object classid="clsid:38481807-CA0E-42D2-BF39-B33AF135CC4D" id="ieooui"></object> <style> st1\:*{behavior:url(#ieooui) } </style> <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:10.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";} </style> <![endif]--> </p><p class="MsoNormal"> <span style="font-style: italic;font-size:130%;" >Aleph </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">A silent letter</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I find it fascinating that the first letter of the Hebrew “aleph-bet” is a silent one. Beginning with silence reminds me of the first recorded activity of God: hovering over the formless, empty chaos (For an exploration of this activity see the first lesson, “A Perfect World” in Richard Pratt’s video series The Primeval History.); it reminds of the friends of Job sitting with him in silence for seven days; it reminds me of Jesus spending nine months in the womb. It reminds me that silence is an important part of communication.</p> <p style="font-weight: bold;" class="MsoNormal">Aleph is for <i>Esher</i> (Blessed)</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in;"> <i>Blessed are they whose ways are blameless,</i></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in;"><i><span style=""> </span>Who walk according to the law of the Lord. </i><span style="font-size:85%;">Ps. 119:1</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in;"><i></i></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <span style="font-weight: bold;">Happiness is…</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Blessed isn’t a particularly contemporary word. It sounds like something from another time, a more religious one, a time when the idea of floating on a cloud and playing the harp was appealing, although I’m not sure that time ever existed.<span style=""> </span>I find “How happy are they”, J.B. Phillips translation in the Beatitudes, more appealing. I want to be happy and if you tell me where you’ve found happiness I’ll probably listen.<span style=""> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">A sort of thesis statement Ps. 119:1 mentions the negative and the positive aspects for the happy life: don’t do this but do do that.<span style=""> </span>I call the first line “negative” because it refers to the absence of something. The admirable Mexican president Benito Juarez (contemporary and friend of Abraham Lincoln) said, “Among individuals, as among nations, respect for the rights of others is peace.”<span style=""> </span>Juarez was a lawyer and his statement reflects a legal perspective, the same one God taught his people in many of the Ten Commandments and that we see here: don’t do something that is wrong. But the God who is wants more <i>from </i>us and more <i>for</i> us than an absence of wrong doing. He wants the presence of good. He wants us to love our neighbor…to be proactive about seeking their wellbeing. He wants us to start with justice and move beyond that into righteousness.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">The term “blameless ways” feels distant…unattainable… but the following rephrasing draws me in, “Happy are they who haven’t done anything to be ashamed of.” When I think of things I have done that make me feel ashamed, things I wish I could undo, I feel the truth of the psalmists promise; I would be happier if I hadn’t done those things. The blessing wouldn’t be something extra added to my life, but something I would experience as I live that way. </p> <p class="MsoNormal">When I think of the letter A I picture it on a page next to the drawing of a big red apple.<span style=""> </span>When I think of Aleph, I picture someone paused at a fork in the road. Choosing the right path doesn’t just lead to future blessing but to a life so full of blessing and happiness that it runs over to the lives of others.<br /></p>annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-83459824420026822442009-03-10T15:29:00.001-05:002009-03-11T20:48:47.405-05:00<div align="justify">I’m a visual learner—spoken words slip off my mind while written words have greater chance of sinking in—but I didn’t realize just how much I favor my eyes over my ears until I had a long bout of viral pinkeye. I thought the swollen, itchy, oozy stage was the worst part, until my vision became clouded. For days it has been as though I’m looking at life through a foggy windshield. Now that I can barely read or write, now that it’s tiresome to observe the world around me or watch anything on a screen, I realize that these make up the vast majority of my daily activities.<br /><br />Felix Ortiz says that younger generations “listen with their eyes and think with their hearts.” As I come to grip with my own visual preference, I’ve become aware that my eyes give me more autonomy than my ears. A friend of ours is doing a project called “a month of listening” in which he interviews a different person each day of the month. As I’ve listened to the interviews. I’ve realized that when we really listen to someone, we relinquish control and let them take us where they want to go. I can look at what I want from the perspective I chose, whereas I often don’t have a choice about what comes in through my ears, whether it’s elevator, the traffic, and the downstairs neighbor boy who call out insistently “Abuela, Abuela, Abuela.”<br /><br />Eyes and ears are complementary but not interchangeable. Linguistically and semantically, seeing is connected with understanding; hearing with obedience. In the Bible we see that a vision of God is not an end in itself but serves to prepare someone for what God has to say to them, for example, Isaiah 6 relates how Isaiah didn’t only see God, but heard Him ask, <em>Whom shall I send?</em> to which Isaiah responded, <em>Here I am. Send me</em> and Saul’s vision of Jesus on the road to Damascus lead him to ask, <em>What shall I do, Lord?</em> to which Jesus replied, <em>Get up…and go…you will be told all that you have been assigned to do</em>.<br /><br />I hope this exercise in weak vision helps strengthen my ability to hear and maybe even obeying.</div><div align="justify"> </div><div align="justify"><a href="http://4loves.com/pretext/2009/03/first-service-that-one-owes-to-others.html"><span style="font-size:85%;">(Click here for Dietrich Bonhoeffer's thoughts on Listening)</span></a></div>annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-87462113558640644172009-01-21T07:00:00.001-06:002009-01-21T07:03:36.623-06:00Yesterday when Tim asked if I wanted to watch the inauguration ceremony I realized that my normal ambivalence about politics had shifted into a bitter cynicism with an unhealthy bite to it.<br /><br />In the morning we read John 2:23-25,<br /><em><blockquote><em>Now while he was in Jerusalem at the Passover Feast, many people saw the miraculous signs he was doing and believed in his name. But Jesus would not entrust himself to them, for he knew all men. He did not need man's testimony about man, for he knew what was in a man.<br /></em></blockquote></em><br />This lead me back to one of my all time favorite readings called “The Discipline of Disillusionment” from “My Utmost for His Highest” by Oswald Chambers. As I read though it yesterday it felt like the right antidote to my state:<br /><br /><blockquote>Our Lord trusted no man, yet He was never suspicious, never bitter. Our Lord's confidence in God and what His grace could do for any man, was so perfect that he despaired of no one. If your trust is place in human beings, we shall end in despairing of everyone.</blockquote>One of the ways I dig deeper into something is to do word studies (I’m an amateur philologist, which means I have just enough working knowledge to be dangerous) and this time it proved to be a rich exercise for me. When I read “Jesus did not entrust/commit himself to any man” it sounds to me like he didn’t open himself up or give himself over to them, in the sense that if you don’t have a close relationship with or trust someone you keep them at arms length, but it turns out that the Greek work <em>episteuen</em> shares its root with<em> </em><a href="http://strongsnumbers.com/greek/4102.htm"><em><span style="color:#000000;">pistis</span></em></a>, to have faith (in, upon, or with respect to, a person or thing), believe, commit (to trust), put in trust with. This brings to mind a verse that was read in the Northland service on Sunday, <em>Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding </em>(Proverbs 3:5,6),as well as the admonitions not to trust in our resources no matter how strong and secure they make us feel, like horses and chariots made armies of those days feel strong:<br /><blockquote>Woe to those who go down to Egypt for help, who rely on horses, who trust in the multitude of their chariots and in the great strength of their horsemen, but do not look to the Holy One of Israel, or seek help from the LORD.<span style="color:#000000;"> (</span><a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?book_id=29&chapter=31&verse=1&end_verse=3&version=31&context=context"><span style="color:#000000;">Isaiah 31:1-3</span></a><span style="color:#000000;">)</span></blockquote>The idea that came to mind was resting your weight on something. When we used to go walking in the mountains of Mexico, Tim was always on the lookout for a good walking stick. He would pick up sticks that seemed like they were the right length and then he would lean onto them with his whole weight. More often than not they would snap. Tim would throw them away and keep looking for one that would bear his weight if he slipped and needed help to catch his fall.<br />I hear John saying that Jesus didn’t need to lean onto people to know that they would snap if he were to put the weight of his trust on them. But this didn’t make him angry or cynical. He knew that before he came to earth, in fact that is precisely why he came.<br /><br />So when I find myself suspicious and bitter, it’s probably a symptom of me misplacing the weight of my hopes and desires; no matter how much I like a person or how competent they are, they are not the foundation of my hope, and I only have myself to blame it I get disappointed when I expect them to save me. Instead I want to be like the psalmist who sang, <em><span style="color:#000000;">Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God. (</span></em><a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?book_id=23&chapter=20&verse=7&version=31&context=verse"><em><span style="color:#000000;">Psalm 20:7</span></em></a><em><span style="color:#000000;">)<br /></span></em>annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-11235162887290832082008-12-29T13:36:00.000-06:002008-12-29T13:40:53.514-06:00Urban ComplexityYears ago I took a seminar class entitled, “Urban Missions and Ministry” in which the professor, Roger Greenway, claimed that throughout its history the protestant church has very few successful models of mission and ministry in large cities. Today it struck me that the increased complexity and decreased autonomy of city life might be at the root of that.<br /><br />At the risk of falling into caricature, I think it is fair to say that on the whole people who live in the countryside are more independent, more self-reliant than the city dwellers. For example, think just about transportation: someone in the country is directly responsible for their personal and their work vehicles. If a given farmer or rancher can’t fix their truck or tractor, they probably have a friend, neighbor or hired hand who keeps thing running. On the other hand, living as I do in a city of thirteen million people, I don’t even own a car. I get around town in trains, busses and taxis that whole services of people maintain and coordinate. I have more options than the farmer, ranging from more expensive and personalized (taxi) to less expensive and less flexible (public transportation), of which I frequently choose to have less autonomy but I also have much less responsibility. My transportation needs are met within a complex system of superhighways, bridges, tunnels, tracks, etc. that might work much better, or much worse, than the simple system of a farmer driving his truck down a two lane dirt road.<br /><br />Even if I chose to have more autonomy and responsibility by owning a car here, I couldn’t escape the implications of the complex system in which I live; every pedestrian, cross street, bus and train crossing, impinges on my self-rule.<br /><br />While someone in the country might go days without seeing another person if they chose, every aspect of city life is affected by the strangers around me. Growing up on three acres of untilled Kansas prairie, I could do just about whatever I wanted inside the house without affecting the next-door neighbors, whereas now I share an elevator, hallways, and light wells with twenty one other units in a space of 100 ft by 35 ft by 70 ft, so colicky babies, social habits, and music choices affect us all.<br /><br />In part, the Protestant Reformation reacted to the all pervasive system of the Roman church and engendered a style of Christianity which highlights personal responsibility to God and to our neighbors. History has shown that Protestantism fosters individualism and self-reliance. Whether you see these as positive or destructive, probably says more about you, your culture and life experiences than it does about them, nevertheless Scripture paints the picture of the progress of redemption as a move from a garden, with a very simple form of relating to other humans and to God, to a city, whose complexity of imagery boggles our imagination. Neither this knowledge nor the numbers of people who live in large cities around the world has done much to push the protestant church to learn to function well in cities.<br /><br />I used to live next to one of the largest cities in the world so I thought I knew something about city life. But now that I live in a forest of apartment buildings, I realize that I my former way of life was really suburban, which seems to be a sort of happy medium between isolation and complexity. That life looks very attractive when my upstairs neighbor is still hosting a party at 4 A.M. or I can’t find an empty taxi because it’s raining. But God has drawn us to this city and it is teaching me about interdependence and complexity.<br /><br />I don’t yet know how it all translates into Christian community, but I’m guessing it will necessitate some changes in my way of thinking and living that will strike at my personal boundaries that protect my independence and self-determination and the as well as the boundaries that delineate the community of faith from the community at large, as we see in God’s instructions to the exiles through Jeremiah: “Also, seek the peace and prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile. Pray to the LORD for it, because if it prospers, you too will prosper" (29:7).annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-84052811942887103212008-05-14T14:16:00.001-05:002008-05-14T14:22:37.983-05:00“Roots is a philosophy of ministry that focuses on processes not on events”: our ministry partner Felix Ortiz teaches this over and over again but I don’t think I ever fully appreciated God’s use of process until my study this week study of Exodus. This year Mae, Janelle and I have been on a whirlwind trip through Scripture as we try to get the big picture of who God is and what He’s up to without getting bogged down in specifics like, “what do those ten horns stand for?” We started with Job (<a href="http://4loves.com/annette/job.doc">job.doc</a>) where we saw God as both transcendent (“Did you put the stars in their place? Do you storehouse the wind?”) and imminent (“So Job… Let’s talk…what do you think now?”) both free to do what he chooses to do and responsive to Job’s request for a face to face meeting.<br /><br />Then we moved on to Genesis where what stood out to us was the depth and breadth of mankind’s sin— The LORD saw how great man's wickedness on the earth had become, and that every inclination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil all the time. The LORD was grieved that he had made man on the earth, and his heart was filled with pain (Genesis 6:5,6)—as well as God’s decision to enter into covenants with humanity in general, though Noah, and with one group specifically, though Abraham. Next we flew ahead to Revelation to see how the story ends…to get a glimpse of God’s “end game” where what hit me personally was the realness, the solidness if you will, of sin.<br /><br />Matter seems real, especially what you can touch. In school we’re taught that matter can neither be created nor destroyed; it exists and won’t stop existing even though you can change its shape. For example, although a log disappears when you burn it, anyone who cleans fireplaces will tell you it’s still around. Because we don’t “see” sin, maybe its effects but not the sin itself, we don’t think it’s real in the same way that a book or water is real. We forget about it and we think it’s gone. But Revelation made me see that that perspective is as naïve as when children cover their eyes and think that because they can’t see you, that you can’t see them. Sin is real; it has a solid presence and it has to be dealt with as witnessed to by the pouring out of the bowls of God’s wrath.<br /><br />All my life I’ve had a tension in my mind between the passages of the Bible where it talks about people being held accountable for what they have done and where it says “there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” but in these readings it became clearer: I am accountable for every one of my sins. They don’t evaporate because I’m “a Christian.” They are real, solid, registered in my account… BUT, and of course this is why it is really good news, if I “die with Christ” then his death pays for them. But I’m getting ahead of myself.<br /><br />Our pastor has been preaching on the 10 commandments so after Revelation we jumped to Galatians to help us put into perspective the relationship between Christians and the Law. As I mapped out the contrasts Paul emphasizes (<a href="http://4loves.com/annette/Galatians.pdf">Galatians.pdf</a>), I saw the great divide is not between the law and grace but between human efforts, or “works” of any kind, (it just so happens that for the people at that moment it was trying to keep the Jewish law) and Jesus’ work. What I took away from that study is the desire to live more aware of the fact that I died with Christ so my fleshly desires are dead and the life I live is Christ’s, which is a peek ahead at the process I mentioned earlier.<br /><br />From Galatians we flipped back to Exodus with the idea of looking for what we can learn about slavery and freedom because Galatians talks a lot about the two. None of us got more than halfway through the book and none of us had any notable insights into slavery or freedom but our group isn’t about sticking to a schedule, but following where God leads us as a result of the time and energy we choose to put into it.<br /><br />We were all very familiar with the story of the plagues and the Passover but that didn’t keep us from being struck by the process of it all. Why did God put up with Moses whining and waffling? Why did God harden pharaoh’s heart? Why so many plagues? Why not just soften pharaoh’s heart and get the people out as soon as Moses walks into the country? Why could the sorcerers produce some of the signs like frogs but were stopped up at gnats?!?<br /><br />For quite a while now the idea of “multifaceted good” has been at the forefront of my thinking about God and his actions. If I can accomplish something, one good, worthwhile thing, with my actions, I’m pleased. But God accomplishes a wide variety of good things through every step of his plan—various kinds of good in the lives of each individual touched or involved as well as good in the community, in the world and in the heavenlies. So as I look at the process of the exodus I assume that He is working out a multi-faceted good in the lives of each individual as well as in his overarching plan. I trust that the process did not include an ounce of unnecessary suffering for man or beast. The fact that the Exodus happened 430 years “to the day” after the Israelites had gone to Egypt shows me the detailed precision of God’s process; it may be mysterious, inscrutable to me, but I can rest in the assurance that no detail has been overlooked or underestimated.<br /><br />Process chafes me. I am impatient: although it is incomprehensible for Tim, I often read the end of books first; I like knowing how a movie ends; I tell jokes badly because I just want to get to the punch line. God however is not impatient. He is more like our chef friends who are willing to cut pasta noodles by hand or let meat cook all afternoon because they know that the process produces the best results.<br /><br />In Exodus we see that the process from slavery to freedom does not end as soon as the Israelites leave Egypt or cross through the Red Sea. From our vantage point we know that God’s people are on a path that will leave many dead in the wilderness because of their lack of faith and will eventually send the whole lot of them into exile. Living in the promised land of milk and honey and in the intimate exclusive relationship of being His people and having Him for their God seems to be almost a mirage, something that looks like it could be a real possibility but quickly vanishes, or more accurately a shadow whose reality is found in Christ.<br /><br />Since I undervalue process, I want to jump in my own life from the Passover (“Thank you Lord for providing a way of escape from the just punishment for my sins through the blood of Jesus”) to eating grapes in the Promised Land. But Exodus reminds me there is probably much more process ahead.<br /><br />After crossing the Red Sea Moses and the people sang, “In your unfailing love you will lead the people you have redeemed” (Ex. 15:13). The images conjured up in my mind which by those words contrast sharply with the very next thing that happens: they travel for three days without finding water and then when the do find some it’s bitter. I don’t think this is a coincidence; I think it illustrates Galatians 3:3, “Are you so foolish? After beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort?” I think there were Israelites who thought “Thank you God for getting us out of Egypt. Thank you for the land you’ve promised to give us. We’ll take it from here.” And God is saying to them, “Uh, hello down there. Yoo Hoo. Remember me? I do have big, wonderful plans for you but you can’t make it without me. Really, you can’t. That’s not a criticism, just a fact. But it’s fine because as we work this out together you will get to know me and we will have an amazing time. The truth is that I am what makes the promised land so good, so really you can have the best part right now, though I don’t deny that there are parts of me you will enjoy more when you get where I’m taking you. But please don’t slip into thinking that I’m an accessory to your plan. That won’t work and I’ll have to let you find that out the hard way. So if you’re thirsty, hungry, whatever, tell me and I will answer that request in real, sometimes really surprising but always real, ways.”<br /><br />I don’t think I’ll ever become a gourmet chef, or do anything else that requires patience and process on an hourly basis, but at least now I see my impatience in stark contrast to how God works. And hopefully next time I feel like I’m wandering in the desert thirsty, instead of questioning His love, I’ll try to remember that it probably is in fact a sign of his love that He won’t let me get too far own my own.annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-1155594460479984642006-08-14T17:26:00.000-05:002006-08-14T17:27:40.500-05:00<p class="MsoNormal">“There might have been a time when canned foods were considered good. Maybe when fresh fruits and vegetables were hard to find out of season, people were glad to have them available in a can. But when you’ve had good corn right off the cob, the canned stuff is, well, it’s a disappointment.”</p> <p class="MsoNormal">My friend Susan agreed with me, just as much about fruits and vegetables as about her small group Bible study, the actual topic at hand.<span style=""> </span>Her group had been watching a teaching series on DVD over the summer and she was ready to be done with it already.<span style=""> </span>As she talked, I was struck by the parallels between canned teaching and canned food.<span style=""> </span>Something is usually better than nothing and the canned product was designed to take the place of the labor intensive and spotty quality of home canning.<span style=""> </span>But my hunch is that something canned it most enjoyable when it is not served by itself but as one ingredient of something prepared fresh, like the can of corn added to the worlds best cornbread recipe.</p>TimGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06309973042383478524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-1154379849917149772006-07-31T15:59:00.000-05:002006-07-31T16:04:09.936-05:00Running through a wooded area in New Jersy I stopped a few times to enjoy the deer and rabbits i saw along the way. My impression of the "darling bunnies" reminded me of friends who have battled deer and rabbits destroying their gardens and lawn. I thought how it is only possible to to romanticize things when we aren't actually in frequent, prolonged, uncontrolled contact with them.TimGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06309973042383478524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-1144413466826980102006-04-07T07:36:00.000-05:002006-04-07T07:37:46.840-05:00<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p>Behind the words of the worship songs, historic Christian art passed by.<span style=""> </span>A Byzantine looking Jesus healed a blind man. A medieval Jesus stood among his disciples. Then the hand of God creating man from Michelangelo’s Sistine chapel appeared. “Look how purposefully God reaches out toward man and how the man can hardly be bothered to even hold up his arm,” I mused as the image panned out for a fuller view.<span style=""> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">The presentation zoomed back in to focus on the two hands. The next thoughts came to my mind in a jumble together: “Look at that big crack in the picture.<span style=""> </span>I wonder where they get the pictures they use?<span style=""> </span>I guess they use images from slides taken of the originals. I wonder why it’s preferable to have the cracks there instead of PhotoShopping them out? I guess it’s because it lets people know they’re looking at the real painting, at the very images that Michelangelo himself painted, instead of at a replica.”<span style=""> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">The images kept changing but my mind was stuck on the cracks in the pictures of the Sistine chapel and how those cracks indicate authenticity. I remembered our friend in <st1:country-region><st1:place>Mexico</st1:place></st1:country-region> teaching that “sincere” means “without wax” because merchants would glue broken bits of pottery or fill up cracks with wax so people would pay full price for something when in reality it was damaged goods. I thought about how often we try to fill up the cracks in our lives and act like our life is perfect and we’re fine when in reality what we do is keep people away from the real us. But it is the cracks that show that we are authentic. </p> <p class="MsoNormal">We had just been working at a Christian festival where skateboarders and BMX and motocross riders had put on a show followed by a “gospel presentation.” At the time I had wondered why the guys doing the sports didn’t tell their story instead of bringing out the “professional Christian.” I figured that the organizers must have thought the speaker would do a better job speaking than the athletes, but I think they missed the point.<span style=""> </span>Whatever “cracks” or deficiencies might have been present in the athlete’s talk would have been outweighed by its authenticity, by the power of the interest the audience had in the athlete because of his abilities. </p> <p class="MsoNormal">Near the end of the church service that evening a woman with Cerebral Palsy stood up to share some of her story.<span style=""> </span>I frequently had trouble understanding her as she labored to speak but the power of the words I did understand would have been missing if they had come from a less “cracked” source. </p> <p class="MsoNormal">Note to self: don’t worry so much about your “cracks”, your deficiencies and inadequacies; they might be the very thing that gives authenticity to your life in the eyes of others.</p>TimGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06309973042383478524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-1139670019571548742006-02-11T08:59:00.000-06:002006-02-11T09:00:19.586-06:00<p class="MsoNormal">For some it was just another party, just another glass of wine. Maybe some were connoisseurs who swirled the wine in their glasses, savored it in their mouths and exclaimed “Heavenly.” </p> <p class="MsoNormal">Then there was the steward, anxious, facing great shame. He was saved by the unexpected supply. Now he could finally focus on the other details of the party.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">But there were others who saw something more, something supernatural – a shaft of God’s glory piercing the ordinary. For the newly called disciples this was their first taste of His miraculous power.<span style=""> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">But there were those who never forgot: the servants who carried the water.</p>TimGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06309973042383478524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-1137891047082222962006-01-21T18:47:00.000-06:002006-01-21T18:50:47.096-06:00Slow Twitch Muscles Find Their Purpose"I just realized how perfect it is that we got married,” Tim called down to me as I slowly made my way up the steep mountain path. <br /><br />“Really? Great! Why is it perfect?” I asked, fishing for a compliment. <br /><br />“Well it’s perfect for me that you’re slow,” he began. (Not quite the compliment I was looking for.) “If you were as, um, well as fast as I am then I wouldn’t have time to stop and catch my breath. And with my McArdles disease, my muscles need that rest time to get new energy. For example, when we’re skiing and I stop and wait for you, that’s exactly what I need so my muscles don’t get a constricture. Whereas if you were faster than me, I would keep going all the way down the mountain, which could cause me real problems.” <br /><br />“Well I’m delighted to know that something that I’ve never liked about myself has some value.” <br /><br />And truthfully I love the fact that sixteen years, almost to the day, after we met, we are still discovering new ways that we were truly “made for each other.” This incident reminded me of something that struck me after watching the movie “A Beautiful Mind”: the path of loving someone so well that you help them become all that God created them to be is a long one. The mathematician’s wife in the movie could have deserted him; indeed, in real life she did for a while. But if we give up on someone, we can hinder rather than help the process and we will miss out on much joy in the long run. <br /><br />As I’ve been thinking on these things I came across a bit in Desiring God that drove the point home for me. A student of author John Piper's referred to someone whose experience of loving when there was no joy led her to say, "Love in action is a harsh and dreadful thing." Piper responded: <br /><blockquote>Don't jump to the conclusion that there is no joy in things that are "harsh and dreadful." There are mountain climbers who have spent sleepless nights on the faces of cliffs, have lost fingers and toes in sub-zero temperatures, and have gone through horrible misery to reach a peak. They say, "It was harsh and dreadful." But if you ask them why they do it, the answer will come back in various forms: "There is an exhilaration in the soul that feels so good it is worth all the pain."<br /><br />If this is how it is with mountain climbing, cannot the same be true of love? Is it not rather an indictment of our own worldliness that we are more inclined to sense exhilaration at mountain climbing than at conquering the precipices of un-love in our own lives and in society? Yes, love is often a "harsh and dreadful" thing, but I do not see how a person who cherishes what is good and admires Jesus can help but sense a joyful exhilaration when (by grace) he is able to love another person.<br /></blockquote>As we’re surrounded by friends, and a whole world, who have bought into the belief that “love” is all about present gratification, I’m grateful for the reminders that loving someone is a long journey. (And I’m grateful that our journey is so full of joy.)TimGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06309973042383478524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-1111788185987694832005-03-25T15:55:00.001-06:002005-03-25T16:21:40.050-06:00Monday ThursdayWhen i was little i thought "Maunday Thursday" was Latin or something for "Monday Thursday," which made no sense of course but lots of things in life don't make sense and everyone acts like they do so i figured it was just one of those things....<br /><br />We went to church last night, in great part because Veronica told us it would be short. No such luck, but God met us there anyway.<br /><br />My mind was wandering while the pastor droned on and on. At one point my eyes focused in on the communion table. We had eaten the bread and were waiting to be served the "cup" so I started thinking how just awful the"grape juice" is that they use at our church. It can't be real juice, instead it's some syrupy, chemically, fake, purple stuff. It struck me how far that purple drink is from blood, especially from the lifeblood of Jesus that somehow not only pumped through God incarnate but also had the power, the "Deep Magic from <em>before</em> the Dawn of Time," to pay for our sins.<br /><br />The contrast of those two liquids became for me a great image for the contrast between the syrupy thinness of what we do here on earth compared to the richness and power of the eternal reality. At the same time, as I looked at emotion on the faces of people around me (we were seated sort of "in the round") and heard several people share ways that specific verses they had been given at the comunion table minutes before spoke directly to them, I couldn't avoid the fact that God shows up and infuses our thin efforts with eternal richness.<br /><br />Nontheless i'm not sure whether I can deal with more long-winded rambling and lots of syrupy hymns tomorrow at 1 pm. :-)TimGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06309973042383478524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-1110754468435263522005-03-13T16:46:00.000-06:002005-03-13T17:09:09.530-06:00IlluminationThe other day we had this great hike in the Marquesa National Forest between Mexico City and Toluca. It was a perfect day; the sky was azure and totally clear; the sun was so bright it made the yellow wildflowers and the clumps of tall alpine grass shine.<br /><br />As we were walking down towards the road where our car was parked, I looked back up the hill and the beauty stopped me in my tracks. The sun was pouring in the spaces between the tall pines, lighting up the new green grass below.<br /><br />I thought how a scene like that gives rise to the idea of fairies because you recognize that something is infusing it with a quality beyond the natural reality of the place. There is a beauty, a delight, that you know is unique to that moment; it is transitory, ephemeral. You know that next time you go, or maybe even next time you look, it won’t be there.<br /><br />Lately I’ve been rereading my journals, looking to glean insights for the future from what God has taught me in the past. Much of what I have written down is passages of Scripture that were particularly meaningful to me at the moment when I wrote it. But as I look at them now it’s like looking up that hill without the strong afternoon light falling on new grass. I see the words but what made them special — the illumination of the Spirit falling on the fresh growth of the moment — isn’t there. It’s just a hill with trees, all well and good, but not magic.TimGhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06309973042383478524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-1103001129182811652004-12-13T23:03:00.000-06:002004-12-13T23:12:09.183-06:00Christmas MeditationOdd as it sounds today I've been reading the first few chapters of Ezekiel. I know it doesn't sound particularly Christmasy, but what started out as setting my mental stage for praising God by reading a vision of his glory appearing to Ezekiel has turned into an interesting Christmas reflection. So I thought I'd share it with you.
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<br />What Ezekiel saw (I find I can hardly even get a glimpse of what it looked like with my most vivid imaginings, but anyway...) was accompanied by some of the basic elements of an appearance of God, or <em>theophany</em>, throughout Scripture: a whirlwind, fire, and thunderous noise.
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<br />Remember what the Israelites experienced at Mt. Sinai?
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<br /><em>On the morning of the third day there was thunder and lightning with a thick cloud over the mountain and a very loud trumpet blast. Everyone in the camp trembled. Then Moses led the people out of the camp to meet with God, and they stood at the foot of the mountain. Mount Sinai was covered with smoke because the LORD descended on it in fire. The smoke billowed up from it like smoke from a furnace, the whole mountain trembled violently, and the sound of the trumpet grew louder and louder...and the LORD said to [Moses] "Go down and warn the people so they do not force their way through to see the LORD and many of them perish. Even the priests, who approach the LORD must consecrate themselves or the LORD will break out against them."</em>
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<br /><em>When the people saw the thunder and lightning and heard the trumpet and saw the mountain in smoke, they trembled with fear. They stayed at a distance and said to Moses, "Speak to us yourself and we will listen. But do not have God speak to us or we will die."
<br />Moses said to the people, "Do not be afraid. God has come to test you, so that the fear of God will be with you to keep you from sinning." </em>
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<br /><em>The people remained at a distance, while Moses approached the thick darkness where God was. </em> Exodus 19: 16, ff
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<br />Now contrast that with how Christ appeared at his birth:
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<br /><em>And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby...An angel of the Lord appeared to them and the glory of the Lord shone around them and they were terrified. But the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger....
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<br /><em>So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was lying in the manger.</em> Luke 2: 8, ff
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<br />As I had these two images in my mind--a burning, quaking, trumpeting darkness on a mountain and a tiny, defenseless, baby--I was reminded of when God appeared to Elijah,
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<br /><em>The LORD said, "Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the LORD, for the LORD is about to pass by."
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<br /><em>Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.
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<br /><em>Then a voice said to him, "What are you doing here, Elijah?"</em> 1 Kings 19:11-13
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<br />To me this shows that although wind and earthquake and fire, demonstrations of God's greatness and power, accompany his presence and are normal ways for him to "appear" to humans, they don't preclude him from appearing in an unexpected and very personal way. I don't know what Elijah expected when God told him he was going to "pass by" him, but I doubt it was a whisper and a repeat of the question Elijah had already answered.
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<br />I've always loved the phrase in the Christmas carol, "veiled in flesh the Godhead see, hail the incarnate deity" and these passages deepen my understanding of how God veiled his deity when "the Word became flesh." Now when I sing "Silent Night..." I can marvel that the night was filled with normal noises and angelic singing, and as such, silent compared to his coming recorded in Isaiah, "<em>with thunder and earthquake and great noise, with windstorm and tempest and flames of a devouring fire</em>." (Is. 29: 6)
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<br />If you are delighting in the wonder of this, praising God for his heart that sets aside His visible manifestations of glory in pursuit of a personal relationship with you, then please stop here and come back to read the rest some other time. And if you weren't doing that before, maybe stop anyway, sing, "Hark the Herald Angels Sing," and then come back and read the rest. <smile>
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<br />But part of me wants to understand why sometimes God comes in thick darkness up on a mountain ready to have anyone killed who touches it, only accessible by properly consecrated priests, and one time he comes born like any other baby and greeted by unsanctified shepherds at angelic enticement.
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<br />There are lots of possible answers. The most "obvious" one --that the Old Testament God is harsh and punishing and the New Testament God is love--I reject right off because it is the same God and because punishment and love are not mutually exclusive. Although I do believe that there is a developing nature to how God has communicated with mankind. Along this line of thought, God had to teach us about himself, and part of that is that he is GOD--bigger, more powerful, more holy, more just, more anything than you can even begin to imagine; "I am the potter, you are the clay," GOD. So sometimes He shows up in a way that we humans can get a small glimpse of his majesty, power, and holiness, but actually just a little bit because no one can see God and live. (Ex. 33:20) All of which makes Elijah's personal conversation with a whisper, and a baby in a manger mind-boggling.
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<br />God himself gives an explanation for the show on Mt. Sinai. In Exodus 19:9 he says to Moses that the thick cloud is so that the people will respect Moses forever. Moses gives the people two reasons: "<em>Do not be afraid; for God has come in order to test you, and in order that the fear of Him may remain with you, so that you may not sin</em>.'' (Ex. 20:20) I'm using the NASB here. The NIV says the testing is to bring fear of God so they won't sin, but I think that the testing and the bringing fear of God are separate, though related, purposes. I think the general idea of what it means for God to test people has been distorted by our school experiences when we work to rapidly become proficient in something we have little knowledge of in order to perform well in tests from teachers who at times seem intent on highlighting our lack of proficiency. But the purpose of a test is to show up what is there. Think about a pregnancy test. The results only show up what is already true whether you take the test or not. So God's awesome coming shows up the attitude that people have towards him and serves as a reminder of who he is and why he deserves to be obeyed.
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<br />So we're back to earth(quake), wind and fire, understandable from God, but small, dependent child, beyond comprehension.
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<br />I think one of the reasons why people who don't appreciate or accept the incredible grace of God wrapped in a baby are nevertheless drawn to celebrate Christmas is that something in them believes that God has become "tender and mild" and that they don't have to worry about the judgment of a God who comes with earthshaking thunder and blazing lightning anymore. But that is what comes from only reading one chapter of a book with about 1,240 chapters.
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<br />annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-1102997902562441792004-12-13T22:16:00.000-06:002004-12-13T23:02:53.426-06:00Just What I NeededWe were at a foster home where we had been hanging out, playing soccer, and talking with the kids. I was talking with one of the older guys when he brought up the war in Iraq, how it’s all about oil, how bad and greedy Americans are, etcetera, etcetera. My usual approach in the face of an inflammatory topic of conversation is to try to change the subject, gracefully if possible, but with him I actually confronted a few of his statements because I figured he was just parroting what he had heard from adults and teachers and on tv.
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<br />This incident stuck with me and has bothered me for lots of reasons. Being an American living overseas during this moment in global politics isn’t fun and its always painful for me to hear my country maligned. But I’m also bothered by how emotionally I react inside to criticism or to people who disagree with me; I don’t like how that incident got under my skin and months later still puts a bad taste in my mouth. And I’m not comfortable with the implications of my “conflict-avoidant” modus operandi. I’m not wanting to talk politics all the time, however I know that by steering clear of some topics, or even some people, I’m letting my fear, of my discomfort and my anger, shut the door on something God might want to do in me and or in them.
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<br />That’s why a sermon “Receptive Grace” by Tim Keller, pastor of Redeemer Presbyterian Church in NYC, was just what I needed to hear. It provides simple but very insightful answers to the question “How should I relate to people with whom I deeply differ, even people whose views or actions might be truly offensive to me?”
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<br />We all know that intolerance isn’t the answer, but Dr. Keller showed me that simple “tolerance” as it is touted today -which doesn’t evaluate the other person negatively but neither does it enter into relationship with them- is a shallow counterfeit of what God modeled, and calls us to: having the strength of character and conscience to enter into relationship with them even though we still believe they are wrong.
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<br />I liked it so much that I listened to it again and took notes, then I turned those notes into a summary outline that <a href="http://4loves.com/annette/ReceivingGrace.pdf">you can download and read</a> <span style="font-size:85%;">{</span><a href="http://4loves.com/annette/ReceivingGrace.pdf"><span style="font-size:85%;">click here</span></a><span style="font-size:85%;">).</span> I don’t know if it will translate without hearing the sermon but I hope so. (You can purchase the sermon at Redeemer’s web site <a href="http://www.reedemer.com/">http://www.reedemer.com/</a>, just put “receptive grace” in the search field for individual sermons on the “buy sermons” page.)
<br />annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-1099270734527143822004-10-31T18:58:00.000-06:002004-10-31T21:04:35.690-06:00Traveler's Tale # 1In the face of all the chaos and pain in the world, it’s hard sometimes to believe that God is really in charge of what’s going on. But frequently in insignificant details I see His hand, lovingly taking care of His people, and these remind me that He on top of the big stuff too.
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<br />In the air halfway from Miami to Buenos Aires, Margie sat up with a start. “Azure, I totally forgot to pack underwear!” she said the friend next to her.
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<br />“Don’t worry about it,” replied Azure, “I’m sure we’ll figure something out.”
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<br />But you know how it is when you do something like that. You mentally kick yourself, “If only I had taken a bit more time to pack, this wouldn’t have happened”; you think through strategies, “Well I can wash out the pair I have on every night. But what if they don’t dry enough by the next morning? I wonder if the house where we’re staying has a dryer? Do people use dryers in Argentina?”; and just generally stress out about something you know is fairly non-transcendental, “I can’t believe that one of the first things I’m going to talk about with this pastor who is hosting us is that I need to buy some underwear. How embarrassing.”
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<br />When the long flight was behind her and Margie was taking a shower at Pastor Muniello’s home trying to scrub off the scummy feeling and exhaustion from the long trip, she decided once and for all that she would just wash her underwear every day and dry it as best she could.
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<br />Then while Azure took a shower, Margie unpacked her clothing. She pulled open the top dresser drawer, saw two pairs of underwear and thought, “How nice of Azure to have gone and gotten these for me.” The underwear were not anything Margie would have picked out for herself at home, but in another country facing the prospect of wearing the same pair of underwear for three days, they were more than acceptable.
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<br />It wasn’t till later in the day that Margie had a chance to thank Azure for taking care of her problem. “But I didn’t get any underwear for you,” Azure replied, surprised. “Those must have been already in the drawer when we got here.”
<br /><div align="center"><img src="http://4loves.com/annette/ugly-underwear.jpg" /></div><div align="left">The next day after they had gotten to know the Muniello family better, Margie mentioned the underwear to their hostess, Adriana. “I guess Annette (who had stayed in the room two weeks before) must have left them there,” Adriana responded to the query about the origin of the underwear. “Why don’t you take them back with you and you can give them to her when you see her.”
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<br />I hadn’t left any underwear in Argentina, but I knew exactly what Margie was talking about because those two pairs of underwear had been in that drawer since the first time I stayed in that room two years ago. I have no idea whose they are or where they came from but I love that God’s economy doesn’t waste anything, not even lost, ugly underwear.
<br /></div>annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-1097686757580138942004-10-13T11:54:00.000-05:002004-10-13T12:17:44.623-05:00If you were a tree, what kind would you be?I was talking today about natural disasters with a friend, Adriana. Since she is an architect, the conversation naturally turned to the importance of the construction of a building in how well it weathers a storm. Earthquakes are the primary natural disaster in this area so Adriana explained that for a building to survive them it is important that the construction not be either too weak or too rigid. If it is too weak, it falls apart. So it might seem like the best thing to do would be to create a very strong building with lots of reinforcements and the best concrete blocks held together by the strongest cement. But she went on to explain that a rigid construction runs the risk of cracking so the perfect building is an equilibrium between strength and flexibility.
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<br />This strikes me as very helpful reminder. Storms will come in life and the key to weathering them well is balancing strength and flexibility in my character, belief systems, etcetera. My tendency is to think that “firming up” my self-discipline, or my knowledge, for example is what will get me though the hard times, but talking with Adriana I was reminded that a resulting rigidity could be counterproductive. Yes I need to develop more strength in character, conviction and completion of tasks but those qualities need to be complemented by flexibility.
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<br />I have always loved palm trees. I love their shape. I love them for their association with all things beachy. And now I am reminded that I have admired them for their strength and flexibility, for the way they can survive hurricane winds where a more rigid tree would snap or be pulled out by the roots. Lord, please help me become more like a palm tree, able to stand firm yet adapt to the winds of change that blow through my life.
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<br />annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-1092184806249845362004-08-10T19:38:00.000-05:002004-08-10T19:40:06.250-05:00Just in Case...“Years ago I came up with my answer to the question, ‘If a genie came to you and gave you one wish, what would it be?’” Tim explained to me at lunch the other day. “I decided I would ask to be the happiest person in the world, who didn’t have to suffer to get that way and who would stay faithful to God my whole life (which is really part of the ‘happiest person’ request cause I know that by staying faithful to God I will stay happiest.)”
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<br />“So what would your wish be?” he asked.
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<br />Four days later I have a start at an answer :-)
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<br />In “A Diary of Private Prayer” by John Baillie, I came across the following line, “Make this day a day of obedience, a day of spiritual joy and peace.” (Morning Prayer for the Ninth Day)
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<br />I think a good wish would be that each of my days would be days of obedience, spiritual joy and peace.
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<br />Obedience – This is not one of my strong points, but one of my deep longings is to be used in other’s lives. I know that God created and gifted me for a unique part in bringing about His purposes, which are constantly seeking the best for people. So if I am obedient to Him, I’ll end up reaching my goal of impacting others far beyond what I could do with just my own powers and abilities.
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<br />Spiritual Joy and Peace – I have had lots of wonderful experiences in my life, covering a wide gamut of types of fun, happiness and joy. Through them I’ve concluded that most experiences wash over me, leaving just a good memory and a desire for more. But the taste I’ve had of spiritual joy and peace is different. It wells up from deep inside and can fill the most commonplace, even drudgerous, thing – sitting somewhere waiting or washing dishes – with pleasure so that every moment of life can be satisfying.
<br />annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6590738.post-1091930486446266962004-08-07T20:56:00.000-05:002004-08-07T21:03:21.126-05:00The Long SilenceI know I hold back. I know I’m the person in the parable who buries their talent for fear of losing it.
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<br />What I don’t quite know is what I’m afraid of.
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<br />When it comes to physical stuff, I’m afraid of getting hurt. I guess that’s probably the same in the rest of my life too. So how can I overcome that?
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<br />By just stepping out and doing it. By pushing myself beyond what I feel are my limits.
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<br />I guess wanting to is a first step too and recognizing that burying the talent displeases the Master.
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<br /><em>Lord, please help me step out of the boat. I don’t know what you want me to do out there, but I know that if I keep my eyes on you, sink or walk, you’ll take care of me and you’ll take care of the results that you want to see happen.</em>
<br /><div align="center"><img height="387" src="http://4loves.com/annette/Pedro-logo.GIF" width="281" /> </div><div align="center">Illustration: Benjamin Uzziel Leon Casasola</div>
<br />annette gulickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09806432518603511496noreply@blogger.com0